Don't fly Spirit...Ever.

For those of you who know me, you know I love me some lists. I know it's a little early to be Snarky but I couldn't help myself... It took us a total of 10 hours to get from Chicago to LA. Most of that can be blamed on the airline that we took, Spirit Airlines. And, because of our awesome experience with Spirit, here are my top 10 reasons why I will never fly Spirit airlines again.

10. No Automated Check-In: You have to go all the way down to the end of the terminal by Siberia, I mean Iberian airlines... to wait in a very long line that is being manned by TWO people.

9. Graduated Bag Fees: Of course we all know that if costs money to check a bag but when you are moving ACROSS the country, you have to. And, Spirit has the fabulous idea that your bag should only weigh 40 el-bees (pounds). If you are over the mandated 40 el-bees, they raise the fee by how many pounds are in your bag, 50 pounds and you could be paying 50 bucks. Because of this, all of us in line had to get manually charged a fee by said TWO attendants.

8. Flower Pens: They attach silky, fake flowers to the end of their pens so people won't steal them. Do I have to elaborate?

7. Receipt Boarding Pass: The Spirit boarding pass caused some confusion for the TSA agent checking us in. She said we made our boarding passes up... um yes, I understand you TSA Lady... that's because the boarding pass looks like a grocery receipt from Jewel.

6. Three Hour Delay: Maintenance or weather related? According to the desk, the plane needed maintenance. According to the flight attendant there was bad weather in NY.. but our flight was from Florida to Chicago... Hmmm.... you do the math... Regardless it was 10:30 before we took-off for our 7:30 flight.

5. Weird Engine Noises: See number 6.

4. Loud Flight Attendants: Talky-talky-slam-slam-talky-slam-talky-talky-talky. Stop talking! I can hear you over my noise cancelling headphones and my Enya. I'm trying to sleep ladies and you're jacking your jaws and slamming things around.

3. Rude Flight Attendants: OK, seriously, do not yell over the loud speaker at the woman waiting at the front of the plane for the lavatory, she is obviously oblivious. GO TALK TO HER QUIETLY. And bring me some water!

2. In flight Advertisements: I don't know if Spirit know about target markets but they sell ad space on the tray tables and the overhead storage compartments CTA-style. My ad was for Looney Tunes and I stared at Bugs Bunny's Face for 4.5 hours while listening to my Enya.

1. First Class: OK, what?! The fact that Spirit even offers first class seating blows my mind b/c they are not in any way shape or form even close to a first class operation.

Now, I know that Spirit is an economy airline but come on... step it up just a little and your consumers wouldn't spend an hour posting about why they will never use your airline again.